One of the first things to become less frequent in your life after having a baby are those precious date nights you and your spouse used to have. The freedom to be able to leave the house whenever you wanted without too much thought beforehand is now something of the past. Sometimes, dates don’t happen for a month with your busy schedules and your busy baby. You aren’t going to be perfect at going on consistent dates, especially right after having a baby, but here are some great tips to help you get into a routine of dating your spouse!
1. Have a babysitter lined up BEFORE the baby comes
If you don’t have family around to watch your baby for you it can take time to find someone you really trust to watch your sweet baby. It is also a lot harder to plan last minute dates with a babysitter if you don’t know their availability. So, talk around and see who other people like or suggest you use for your babysitter. Find a babysitter before the baby comes, because things get a lot busier and you may get distracted from your task to find one.
2. Discuss when, and for how long you are comfortable leaving your baby
When your baby is a newborn that first month, or two, you may not be very comfortable leaving your baby at home with a sitter. You are adjusting to your new life, you have a feeding schedule to follow, and you just want all those baby snuggles. That is perfectly fine, we were the same way. Just be sure that you do have a game plan for that first date after a couple months so that you don’t fall into the pattern of not going on dates.
Be sure to have a set date each week for when you go on your dates. If every week is too often, then try to plan for every other week, but still keep dates on the same day so you can plan it into your routine!
3. Talk about something besides baby and work
This is something I have a hard time avoiding, but do try to not talk about work or the baby. It can be so tempting to look at those cute pictures you took of your little babe that day and miss them while you’re on the date, but the date is supposed to be about you and your spouse. Avoid talking about work because you need to separate work from date night too. Destress from work by going on a date and enjoying an evening out with your spouse! Talk about your relationship! Make goals, talk about funny things that have happened or something the two of you would like to spend more time doing.
4. Go on a variety of different dates
Dinner and a movie are our staple dates as a couple. This is a great date to go on, but switch it up every now and then! Some of our favorite memories of dates are when we have gone to a concert, seen a musical, gone on a walk together, or gone to a dance. Luckily, we live in a college town where there are a lot of events to go to. I would look up what things are available to you locally and see if anything catches your interest! Keep things interesting and experience new things together, it is a great way of bonding more with your spouse.
5. Plan your next date at the end of your date
It is important to follow up with another date! If you like planning ahead and having a date scheduled then take those few minutes driving home with your spouse to talk about plans for your next date together. By doing that you can put it instantly on your calendar, and you can secure that plan with the babysitter!
Here’s to making date night more consistent in your relationship!
Ruthie Ridley (@RuthieRidley) says
I love this so much! I will never forget that first date after my first baby!!!
Thank you so much!
Coral R Allen says
These are honestly such great, well thought out tips! I can definitely foresee Connor and I wanting to talk about work/our baby while on a date, so that’s such great advice to focus solely on each other when you’re on your date. And I also love your advice about discussing how long you’re comfortable leaving your baby for. That isn’t something I would have thought of! Love these tips!
It can be hard to not talk about work or baby! I literally try to look at pictures of her while we are gone haha. I’m glad to have given you a new tip!
LOVED this post! We are due this summer with our first so I’m all about the relationship advice for post baby. Keeping a date night is definitely something we have to keep doing as I fully believe it’s super important to keep dating your spouse. Determining how long to stay away from the baby and not talking about work/baby are great tips!